Who's advising you?

Who is advising you?
A few weeks ago during my devotion I was directed to a passage that I do not think I had read before or if I had,  it did not make an impression on me at the time.This time, as I studied the passage, I felt that there was an important message for everyone who is given advice by others. That, I think, is all of us.

Giving and taking advice is a communication act that represents an important aspect of how human beings relate to each other. The Oxford advanced Learners Dictionary defines the word advice simply as, "opinion given about what to do or how to behave" The source and substance of the opinions that we receive matter more than we often realise. Like that which the serpent gave to Eve in the garden of Eden, advice is sometimes unsolicited and seemingly simple, but the consequences of adhering to it could be destructive. The entire course of human history has turned on the words,  "You will not surely die. For God knows that in the day you eat of it your eyes will be opened and you will be like God, knowing good and evil" Gen.3:4-5 (NKJV). Eve should have rejected the advice on two counts: A talking serpent gave it to her and it was in direct contradiction to the authoritative word of her Creator. But the source and substance of the opinion that was given to her were ignored. Eve took the advice of the serpent, man was driven from the garden and human beings die one breath at a time from the moment they are born. As consequential as the piece of advice that the sepent gave to Eve has been, it is not the passage of scripture that is the subject of this post. The advice that has been occupying my thoughts for the last few weeks was actively sought by the one who received it.

1Kings 12:1-14 recounts an intriguing story. King Rehoboam was newly crowned and as an inexperienced King he knew that he needed to seek advice before making important decisions. When his subjects, led by Jeroboam came to him and said, "Your father made our yoke heavy; now therefore, lighten the burdensome service of your father; and his heavy yoke which he put on us, and we will serve you" (vs 4), he responded with the words, "Depart for three days, then come back to me." How did Rehoboam spend the three days? Verses 6 to 11are pivotal to the story. First, the bible says, "King Rehoboam consulted the elders who stood before his father Solomon while he lived, and he said, 'How do you advise me to answer these people?' And they spoke to him saying, 'if you will be a servant to these people today, and serve them, and answer them, and speak good words to them, then they will be your servants forever.'

 Let's analyse the situation. What the subjects requested represented a radical change in the kind of governance that existed in the kingdom. The people had grown weary of the burdensome, onerous leadership style of King Solomon and wanted a change. This paradigm shift would require a rejection of the system which Rehoboam had inherited and an implementation of a new system of kindness, consideration, participatory decision making and mutual satisfaction. As a newly appointed, inexperienced leader, Rehoboam did one right thing. He sought advice.

 First, he consulted with the older, experienced men who were closely acquainted with the practices of the system that existed.  The advice given to Rehoboam by the elders represents a style of leadership currently lauded as the most effective style of leadership for any cultural context. "If you will be a servant to these people ... they will be your servants forever" seems paradoxical but it represents a profound truth about effective leadership.  An effective leader is a servant leader. A servant leader is one who is responsive to the needs of his/her followers. This type of leader is humble, desires to help his/her followers achieve self-satisfaction, accepts people for who they are, is kind, honest, dependable and trustworthy. When followers realise that they are valued as individuals, they repond with love, loyalty and faithful service.  The elders were  advising Rehoboam from the perspective of individuals who had lived and worked under Solomon and knew from experience that Solomon's model of leadership was ineffective. But Rehoboam rejected their advice.

Instead of implementing the change which the people requested and the elders recommended, Rehoboam consulted with young men who had grown up with him. I believe this piece of information  is provided in the story for a reason. The fact that the young men had grown up with Rehoboam suggests that they were no more equipped than he was to make this important decision. They lacked the necessary perspective and values. Their advice was a complete antithesis to what the elders had proposed. The young men proposed that Rehoboam reject the requests of his people and  become what was essentially a dragon king. On the third day, the people returned to Rehoboam to hear his decision. Verse 13 states, Then the king answered the people roughly, and rejected the advice which the elders had given him; and he spoke to them according to the advice of the young men, saying 'My father made your yoke heavy but I will add to your yoke; my father chastised you with whips but i will chastie you with scourges!' Thus, Rehoboam sought advice from two sources and made a choice which shaped the course of his reign and determined his ignominious legacy.

There are crucial lessons to be learnt from this story. I believe this account is placed in the bible particularly to guide people who are new to any position. Whether you are newly married, a new mother or a new manager, advice will factor in your communication with others. When you are appointed to a position of leadership and great influence, it is important that you seek advice. The fact is that whether you seek advice or not, people will take it upon themselves to advise you. Sift every piece of advice you receive. Pay attention to the source and substance of the opinions that guide your decision making. What values and principles do the people who advise you represent? I know it could be difficult to decide whose opinion to accept and what decision to make in certain circumstances.  My suggestion is that your decision always be fruit-flavoured. Yes, take advice that represent the fruit of the spirit. Galatians 5:22 says, "But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffereing, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self control". My friend, be a servant leader.